Can two years away from your home country make you feel like an outsider when you return? To some degree, yes. It makes me re-question;
“What kind of person volunteers themselves to be dropped into a foreign land indefinitely?”
I suppose you have different types; the adventurous who will take on anything, and those who are willing to exile themselves from their current world. Which am I? I’d like to think the former, but more likely the latter. Hopefully at least a combination of the two.
The outgoing, very social nature of Americans reminded me that small-town Japan is generally rather reserved, at least socially. It felt good to experience the “chit chat” once again that doesn’t really take place in Japan.
As for the American chaos… I think some chaos is good. In fact I needed my kids to experience a bit of chaos. A little USA-vaccination so to speak, to let them feel that the world is much bigger than what they currently understand.
On the Topic of Raising (half American/half Japanese) Children
Of course I could never think of my children as half of anything, only able to experience both worlds. But let’s be honest, they will have benefits and disadvantages. As kids there are instance where they will benefit from the novelty of having a foreign (American) father. Of course my fear is that there will also be exclusion – as being different often creates when you are a child. As adults we value our uniqueness, but a kid just wants to be like their friends.
Then again, “exclusion” is not exclusive to where I live. Kids can be mean, anywhere. And often are. And as much as we’d like to protect them from the realities of life, sheltering them is no solution.
As a father, it’s my job to prepare them. Should they choose to live in Japan, they must have the patience, demeanor and sense of order as a Japanese citizen. Should they choose to live in America they must be able to speak-out and let themselves be heard, to be creative and take risks when called for.
These personalities seem almost at odds. At 180 degrees. Yet, some fascination exists within each culture for the other. Maybe we both wish our own cultures had a little bit more of the character we idealize in each other – to balance ourselves out.
Ultimately I come to the conclusion that there is no one better to exhibit of striking a balance between both cultures, than the example of me and my wife. An imperfect example that we must continue to improve upon. They will need to seek the balance within themselves.
(Read Part 1 of this article)